Ch.4 - An Evil Arrangement
"Okay, okay…I think I got it!" Sith exclaimed, tripping over countless rocks on his way towards the Count.
"Oh boy…this should be good," Count Dooku said rolling his head.
"No, I made progress," Sith nodded rapidly. Dooku shook his head and looked up in desperation. "I'm serious!" Sith said. "Well…just listen at least. Will you do that?"
"Fine. Shoot," Dooku said, trying to focus his attention on the hopeless Sith.
"I've gotten through to Heaven," he said with an evil grin on his face.
"What are you talking about? That's impossible," Dooku said, finally taking Sith seriously.
"Not anymore," he said, clearing his throat as a machine rolled down from the volcanic caves.
"What is that?" Dooku asked suspiciously.
"What does it look like? It's a computer!" Sith said, jumping up and down like a small child.
"Oooooooooooo," Dooku said gasping, and practically petting the thing. "What does it do?" he asked.
"Watch this," Sith said. He snapped his fingers and down came a printer. Sith gently pushed the PRINT button. Instantly, it exploded. Dooku walked away, rolling his eyes once more.
"Give it up! We're dead!" he said, slamming his head into the wall.
"Nononononono! I get that!" he said, enthusiastically. Dooku turned around, and came desperately close to Sith's nose.
"Really? And how did you figure that out?" Dooku asked frustratingly.
"Oh…it was my wits," Sith said, dusting off his cloak.
"Oh…jeez," Dooku said, stomping off again, and leaning hard against the wall of the cave, feeling the burn and enduring the pain.
"Okay, so maybe I haven't gotten the printer entirely figured out, but…"
"BUT, WHAT?" Dooku screamed.
"Okay….so, well…come here," Sith said, gesturing rapidly at Dooku, and eventually he waddled over.
"What?" Dooku asked.
"There's this thing called…called…called…"
"Okay, I realize you can pronounce that word…please move on," Dooku said angrily gritting his teeth.
"INTERNET!" Sith said, his eyes widening in pleasure.
"So…what does it do?" Dooku asked.
"Well…in the normal world…it communicates with anyone and anything you can imagine."
"I'm listening."
"But…in the hereafter, it reads minds…or fixes them..." Sith said, cackling evily. Dooku smirked.
"What have you done?"
"I've broken into Padme's mind…and I've tortured her," he said holding up his hand for a good 5 minutes before it was slapped ferociously by the Count.
"Nice work. But how?" Dooku asked.
"Well…you see, even though she's completely happy with Anakin by her side…previous moments from her life have haunted her in her dreams…with a little help from me," Sith said.
"So…how is this going to help us get out of here?" Dooku asked.
"I'm not sure yet, but it says here…in the afterworld manual…that if one from the Heaven world is so tormented that they cannot stay happy…they will be forced to the underworld…and one from the underworld…will be sent back to present life."
They both smiled evily.
"I believe you are on to something," Dooku said confidently.
"I always am…I always am," Sith cackled. And the two of them journeyed further into the darkness of the volcano pit cave…to devise more plans…and to torture the beloved sleeping in Sir Skywalker's arms.
"Oh boy…this should be good," Count Dooku said rolling his head.
"No, I made progress," Sith nodded rapidly. Dooku shook his head and looked up in desperation. "I'm serious!" Sith said. "Well…just listen at least. Will you do that?"
"Fine. Shoot," Dooku said, trying to focus his attention on the hopeless Sith.
"I've gotten through to Heaven," he said with an evil grin on his face.
"What are you talking about? That's impossible," Dooku said, finally taking Sith seriously.
"Not anymore," he said, clearing his throat as a machine rolled down from the volcanic caves.
"What is that?" Dooku asked suspiciously.
"What does it look like? It's a computer!" Sith said, jumping up and down like a small child.
"Oooooooooooo," Dooku said gasping, and practically petting the thing. "What does it do?" he asked.
"Watch this," Sith said. He snapped his fingers and down came a printer. Sith gently pushed the PRINT button. Instantly, it exploded. Dooku walked away, rolling his eyes once more.
"Give it up! We're dead!" he said, slamming his head into the wall.
"Nononononono! I get that!" he said, enthusiastically. Dooku turned around, and came desperately close to Sith's nose.
"Really? And how did you figure that out?" Dooku asked frustratingly.
"Oh…it was my wits," Sith said, dusting off his cloak.
"Oh…jeez," Dooku said, stomping off again, and leaning hard against the wall of the cave, feeling the burn and enduring the pain.
"Okay, so maybe I haven't gotten the printer entirely figured out, but…"
"BUT, WHAT?" Dooku screamed.
"Okay….so, well…come here," Sith said, gesturing rapidly at Dooku, and eventually he waddled over.
"What?" Dooku asked.
"There's this thing called…called…called…"
"Okay, I realize you can pronounce that word…please move on," Dooku said angrily gritting his teeth.
"INTERNET!" Sith said, his eyes widening in pleasure.
"So…what does it do?" Dooku asked.
"Well…in the normal world…it communicates with anyone and anything you can imagine."
"I'm listening."
"But…in the hereafter, it reads minds…or fixes them..." Sith said, cackling evily. Dooku smirked.
"What have you done?"
"I've broken into Padme's mind…and I've tortured her," he said holding up his hand for a good 5 minutes before it was slapped ferociously by the Count.
"Nice work. But how?" Dooku asked.
"Well…you see, even though she's completely happy with Anakin by her side…previous moments from her life have haunted her in her dreams…with a little help from me," Sith said.
"So…how is this going to help us get out of here?" Dooku asked.
"I'm not sure yet, but it says here…in the afterworld manual…that if one from the Heaven world is so tormented that they cannot stay happy…they will be forced to the underworld…and one from the underworld…will be sent back to present life."
They both smiled evily.
"I believe you are on to something," Dooku said confidently.
"I always am…I always am," Sith cackled. And the two of them journeyed further into the darkness of the volcano pit cave…to devise more plans…and to torture the beloved sleeping in Sir Skywalker's arms.
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